I feel a little like a frond of seaweed floating in this surf at the moment. I am being pulled in many directions & typically am at the mercy of circumstance rather than myself, something I am not good at. If there is a problem, a situation that needs sorting, I usually work it out but at the moment I have to go with the flow and there is much buffeting in its wake.
I realise that sounds very cryptic and I don't mean it to be. Illness has become a feature in our wider family and it has had a knock on effect with worry and sadness mingled with catch ups and laughs. Somehow I feel as though the summer, that beautiful amazing summer of sunshine and walks and endless sea swims, was a little sharper in focus for me than it may otherwise have been.
I always take note of what's around me. The little things catch my eye from the slight pearl-pink sheen of a fragment of shell nestling in the sand to the soaring wings of a kestrel hovering over the cliffs with the sea swirling beneath. This summer I have noticed more. I have wanted to soak up every single thing I see & store it away like a photograph to be brought out at a later date. I want to stow away every turning shade of the trees as they shift their colours into the soft jewel tones of autumn, the umbers and ochres and berry leaves shimmering in the golden light.
I am lucky enough to live in the most beautiful county with its landscape so much a part of my soul that I honestly don't think I could breathe if I had to leave. A little over the top you may think, but I know me well. I have to swim in the sea, feel the cool salt water moving over my skin and dive deep in the depths to swim with shoals of sandeel, run my fingers through the long branches of varied seaweed and generally poke around in the secret pools beneath the waves.
I have to wander along the creeks and coves bordered by swooping woodlands where I can rummage for nuts & berries or search out some other treasure to take home and add to the various flotsam sitting on the windowsills. I need to see the boats tucked around the meandering banks waiting for the tide to lift them back into life once more.
I can't imagine not seeking out the beautiful flora as it moves from flourishing blossom to the seedheads I love so much, the shapes and colours often complimented by the watery backdrop so synonymous with Cornwall.
This is my solace when things are hard. As I said, I am lucky and when the tide pulls me this way & that, this is where I escape to find a clear head again.
Overall, despite the tone of this post, things are good and the summer has been wonderful with the usual mix of family, games, beach and huge meals.
But the pull has been there and I am determined to keep searching out the positives as autumn wends its way;
to continue to forage and turn nature into delicious (hopefully) drinks and preserves. Such a fabulous year for blackberries isn't it?
I am determined to allow the beauty around me to inspire my designs and to lead me maybe into new areas with my work, to take challenges as they present themselves and not miss a single opportunity by being complacent.
And when I am tired as I often am, I will push myself back out there
for yet another swim
in that wonderful, invigorating, mind-clearing sea.
Lucky me x
